A man with few words

Barely in his life he talked ... but he kept everything in his mind

Never in his life that he scolded us ... but he prayed that we all find the right way in our lives

Yes.. he was a man with few words...

He spared no time for chit chat.. no, but he worked hard to put us in the best education he could afford

He never gave us complement, no.. but inside his heart, we knew that he was proud of us... as he kept working hard

Yes.. he was a man with few words...

Never he told us that he loved us, but He didn't have to ...

What he has done in his life have showed us that he loved us more that everything.

Yes.. he was a man with few words...

He has never complained about his illness...

No one can ever know how much the pain he ever felt...

Up until he left us ... he was still the same person ...

He told no one...

He even waited until the moment that his soulmate was not beside him.

He loved us that much ... that he quietly left ....

He did not want anyone of us watch him go....

He did not want to see any tears following his journey...

Oooh, daddy... how much we hope that you were not a man with few words......

However, none of it matters now...cause we believe that God do not count how many words came out of your mouth.......What you did in your life really matters.... And nothing bad we can remember of what you've done.

We know you love us....and we hope you also know that we love you....

We thank God for include us in the life of a man like you....

A man with few words..............

Letting go

Dan hari itu pun datang..
hari di mana kami sekeluarga harus merelakan seseorang yang kami kasihi dari hidup kami....
hari di mana kami sekeluarga menyadari bahwa apapun yang kami lakukan...tak dapat melawan kehendak Tuhan...
hari di mana kami mengingat kehidupan seseorang yang kami kasihi...
hari di mana derai air mata tak tertahankan...
namun, di atas itu semua... hari yang membebaskan ... hari yang memang telah dinantikan oleh beliau.....
hari di mana ia menikmati surga bersama dengan Tuhan....

Papa...we know that you are far better now with God and His angels...
We know that you are not in pain anymore...
It is us that in despair, because we have to let go such a great person from our life...
Like people says .... Die is about those who were left behind.
Farewell, papa....We love you..

About giving up

Hampir mau putus asa......
Bukan dengan kerjaan yang dead line nya menghantam bertubi tubi......
Bukan dengan keadaan papa yang tidak sehat-sehat......
tapi dengan sebuah proyek akhir kuliah yang bernama Business Plan.
Hate it so muuuuuchh... with all my heart!!!

Aku tau bahwa fase ini akan lewat sebelum aku mencapai titik putus asa yang sebenarnya....
Tapi tetap saja aku merasa ingin memutar balik waktu ke 2 tahun yang lalu... saat aku memutuskan untuk kuliah di kampus ituh...... huhuhu.......Tak dinyana, tugas akhirnya susah sekali..........Huhuhu.......

Jadi ingin meninggalkan bangku kuliah tanpa menyelesaikan tugas akhir..... tapi tetep ingin dapet gelar mm (biarpun dengan huruf kecil, bukan huruf besar)....
Damn........i just hate this moment. Hate it.....so....... much.......
Business Pain!!! in the a**!!!!!!

Update

Wow.... 10 bulan berlalu tanpa ada tulisan baru di blog ini. Padahal, banyak kabar baru dalam kehidupan saya...... yang mengejutkan, yang menyenangkan, maupun yang menyedihkan.

Mengejutkan di saat saya mengetahui bahwa I am expecting... and it's already 30 weeks now..... Why surprise? Karena saya tidak merencanakan, bahkan cenderung menghindari. Maklumlah... masih jadi anak kuliah yang sibuk dengan tugas tugas kuliah. Tapi kalau memang diberi kepercayaan oleh Tuhan, ya saya pastinya bersyukur.....

Berita yang menyedihkan... well.. ginjal papa sudah semakin menurun fungsinya sejak beberapa bulan yang lalu...... Air di paru paru sudah mulai menenggelamkan fungsi pernapasan...nafsu makan hilang sama sekali dan tidur adalah 90% kegiatan sehari-hari nya. Akhirnya, papa harus menjalani hemodialisis (cuci darah) secara rutin 2x seminggu. Kabar baiknya...sesak nafasnya sekarang menghilang, nafsu makan sedikit bertambah. Kabar kurang baiknya.. entah mengapa setiap tengah malam papa selalu bangun dan tidak bisa menahan diri untuk bolak balik ke toilet, mengeluh gatal, mengeluh ini mengeluh itu sehingga membuat orang orang di sekeliling nya termasuk saya ikut ikutan bangun. Entah apa yang terjadi ... dan sampai sekarang masalah ini masih belum bisa teratasi. Mudah-mudahan mama bisa tetap kuat dan sehat mendampingi papa.

Berita lain : perkembangan tugas akhir kuliah masih tersendat sendat. rasanya akan terjadi delay dalam periode kelulusan saya.. hiks......